Bye Bye Bali

On the eve of our last night in Bali, I thought I’d better tear myself away from my sun-bed, brush the sand out of my bikini bottoms and share some of my thoughts about this delightful island. It gives Phil a break from the laptop and gives you a break also! Only joking, he’s done a sterling job and I think aside from the ‘Phil’ jokes that only he understands, a good part is interesting to others apart from us. Let’s hope so anyway!



Bali is everything I thought it would be, plus some more and I’m certainly not disappointed. I think Rashmi and Steve & Jan B would particularly enjoy Bali after Goa, but in fact, any visitor to the island could not fail to enjoy it. I had anticipated that it would be much like Goa and I was going to start out comparing the two but they are worlds apart so I’m not even going to try. We’ve only dipped our toes into a little of Bali over this past week, okay maybe more than dipped, perhaps we’ve gone up to our ankles, but I can only make judgement on what we’ve experienced in the limited time that we’ve spent here. After all, I’ve only walked for 5 hours, sunbathed for 8, biked for 6 hours and we’ve only stayed here for 7 nights and eight days. There are a couple of things that I don’t like about Bali but I’ll come to these later on.

Our hotel The Gryia Santrian www.santrain.com is a well lived in hotel and perfect and for the likes of Phil and me. We have a garden room which is the cheapest room you can get for your money. Certainly not 5 stars but the pool is great, it’s right by the sea, nothing is too much for the staff and everywhere is kept spotlessly clean. The room is more than adequate; we have a TV, a kettle, a fridge and a continuous supply of electricity and hot water. What more could a girl want? There are many other hotels along this stretch of coast including Sanur Beach and The Hyatt, we’ve dipped in a few and from what I can tell, without delving too deeply, Phil has chosen the best. After our experiences in Goa, this hotel is pure luxury for us. What’s nicest of all, is that we’re all middle aged, it’s not a young back-packer age set, so thank god we don’t stand out like a pair of wrinkly geriatrics. There are lots of German guests, a fair share of Australians, a smattering of French and Dutch and mercifully only a few English. Me and Phil unsurprisingly get taken for Germans which is probably down to the fact that Phil is half German and I have bleached hair.

Being a passenger on the motorbike wasn’t a good experience for me. After many hours going pavilion with Phil in Goa, spending many happy hours driving down pot-holed crumbling roads, winding round the paddy fields in Goa dodging holy cows and wild buffalo, you’d think the highways of Bali would be a piss in the park? You were wrong, it was my worst nightmare!!! Okay, the roads are better here than in Goa, they even have traffic lights but the volume of traffic is what makes it so scary. I went out 2 days with Phil on the bike but that was already too much for my high blood pressure. Phil tried to bully me into going out with him the last 2 days of hire by calling me a “woos”. I maybe many things, but woos I aint. Even the time when we were in Koh Samui when he made me get off the bike because it wouldn’t get up the hill with both our weights and being chased by wild dogs and slipped 20 feet down in the undergrowth, clinging onto wet roots for dear life was a better option than 2 more days on the bike.

We’ve found things cheap in Bali compared to India, again I shouldn’t compare because its not fair; prices are cheaper here than in Europe but you’ve got to search hard for the best prices. You can call me cheap but we’re not here for a normal holiday and have to stick to the budget. For example, the local laundry is half the price as the hotel. Beach restaurants or shacks as I call them can be just as expensive as the hotels but you’ve got to walk to find the best value for money. Yesterday we had a long walk, right of the hotel and all the way to the end of the path. We found a lovely local Balinese shack where we had a couple of beers and some lovely prawn and avocado salads, all for around £6. Only downside was, it took an hour to walk there and an hour to get back to the hotel.

Every dish I've tasted in Bali has been edible.  I've been a little bit disappointed with some of the Balinese food but mainly they have been toned down for the tourists.. The few Bali ‘tourist’ dishes that we have sampled seem to be rice with chicken or fish in a coconut or peanut sauce. They are tasty but again, a mish-cum mash of Japanese & Chinese with a hint of Thai. The noodles are good but the worst thing about the menus is the amount and influence of western food. It’s a shame but I guess they cater for the masses. If we were brave enough we’d taste the food from the wagons on the beaches, but although they would be cheap as chips, they look so unappetising, I would rather starve. I experienced a little taste of ‘Bali Belly’ in the first few days but I think this was down to too much beer and not enough water. Dehydration as apposed to food poisoning.  


The local beer in Bali is called Bingtang and it’s very good to drink especially when its ice cold. The only trouble is 2 pints for me and I’m as bloated as a Buddha. They do have a local wine called Hatten but it’s not so cheap at £3.50 a glass. I’d be more than happy with a G&T but spirits are even more expensive than the wine. Guess it’s because it’s imported?


For some reason we can’t make calls or access voicemails from our UK mobile phones. We can make and receive texts but these aren’t cheap at around 40 pence per text. I’ve tried to phone T-mobile on 150 but to no avail and I think both phones are blocked. We are PAY-AS-YOU-GO customers so I’m not sure what the problem is. If anyone has an idea how to sort us out than I would be more than wholly grateful. We don’t intend to use them much but it’s nice to have in an emergency from home. I am thinking if the worst comes to the worst, than we will have to try and forward our calls to a UK mobile number. Any volunteers???

The sun is vicious in Bali and I have fallen a victim even though I have only laid out for a total of 8 hours in 7 days. The many Germans guests bag the sun beds by 8am and lay out from dawn to dust. They must have skins of leather. Our lovely Australian neighbours across the way, commented on my burnt skin but with English skin you have to go pink before you go bronze and boy have I been so careful. Or at least I thought I had, only 1 and a half hours and my 10 year old battered bikini bottoms had ridden up my bum crack without me realising and exposed, my white bum cheeks. I didn’t realise the damage until I came back to the room and felt the damage when I tried to sit down on the wicker chair (wicker chair no cushion). OOUCH!! So bad was the burn I may as well have been wearing a thong. Don’t even go there, it’s not even a pretty thought let alone a pretty sight. Safe to say, a lesson learnt! I shall persevere with the tan though, albeit gently as I don’t want to turn up in Oz as a white English Pom, but that said, a red English Pom would be even worse!!

The only thing I don’t like about Bali is the persistent touts that harass you everywhere you turn. Turn left or right on the beaches and even before you get out of the hotel grounds, they are upon you just like a bunch of hungry locusts. I can’t say I blame them though, tourism is 50% of their livelihoods but even so, it is enough to get a girl down. The constant questions of “You want transport?” or “You want boat with glass bottom?” and “I give you massage (to me) or I give you massage big boss to Phil” 50 times in as much time as it takes you to walk 50 metres is FRUSTRATING. Initially I was tempted to tell them where to go but the locals are so beautiful and so charming and it’s not aggressive that you can’t bring yourself to do it. Instead I reply “thank you but no thank you” to which the reply you normally get is “okay, maybe later, maybe tomorrow, I give you my card”. You are nobody in Bali unless you have a card. This makes me an official ‘nobody’. Phil doesn’t do so well as me on the streets although he has got better of late. In the early days he stops and gives a very long explanation as to why he doesn’t want a taxi, massage or boat with a glass bottom. And even then he comes away promising them, the locals, with a “maybe another day”. Which just gets their hopes up and we have to go through it all again when they see us the next times we pass them.


To sum up, Bali is a great island to come on holiday. The locals are charming, young girls and boys are beautiful and charming with the biggest smiles. Search and search again for the local dishes and prices, it is worth it. If it were me coming for a 2 week break, my advice would be don’t risk your life on a bike, take a taxi for 20 US dollars and do the volcano, check out the temple and do a boat trip. I haven’t said much about the bike trip to KUTA, but well, I wouldn’t bother, unless that is you’re staying in Sanur and are under 25. One half an hour in Kuta was enough for me. Bali though is a great place and you must come and see it for yourselves.


Tomorrow we set sail (or flight more aptly) for Australia. We are ready for Australia but I wonder, is Australia ready for us????.